the kooky American Idol kids
Those wild and crazy AI singers made Freddy Mercury do a double axle in his grave. He was verklempt!
The show started with a plop and a fizzle when Bucky failed to enunciate the song lyrics of Fat Bottomed Girls. He did okay. Gave the song a country edge and made it his own.
Paula said, "Bucky...you..sang like uh..you did...really did Queen proud and you...oooohhh look like you made it your own tonight."
Chris Daughtry, bald guy was up next and sang some song I had never heard before. He is a complete hard rocker. He was typical Chris which was loud and in your face but quietly hot. Paula said, "Chris...ohhhh. Umm...you uh...had amazing vocals and...sang like...good."
Kellie "dumb as rocks" Pickler de-hee hawed herself to sing Bohemian Rhapsody. She was all lit up like a jack o' lantern with funky lighting. I guess she was all right, I wouldnt buy the single. She didnt understand something Simon said which is no big surprise since she only completed third grade. Paula said, "You look...uhhhhh...Kelly, I wasnt sure what to think... you ...when I heard... Good job."
Ace Young will probably get booted. I don't think he's all that and a bag of Fritos. Seriously. I dont even remember what he sang thats how forgettable it was. Paula said, "Ace, after you get voted off WHICH I WILL PERSONALLY see to, we can go back to my house and I can 'help' with your career."
Elliot Yamin, who I so badly want to buy braces for if I could afford to, sang Somebody to Love. He has a great voice. I like that song. I used to sing it before I was married and thought I would die alone in a cold water flat with ten cats. It has a personal meaning. Paula now asked for her vicodin and a bottle of scotch.
Katharine McPhee sang something, I guess it was all right. I don't remember because I got up to go eat a plum. When I came back, Paula had started to drool and they cut to a commercial break.
Taylor Hicks sang Crazy Little Thing Called Love. He was hopping all over the stage like a jumping bean or someone who has to work off a sugar high. Paula said, "Looksh like you had shome fun out there Saylor....we wash wondering where .....Taylor had gone....hesh back."
Paris was the last singer. I thought she did a fine job, the girl has an amazing voice. I dont think she will make it to the final two but I liked her hair extensions. Paula said something incoherent and rambling and nonsensical. The phone rang at this point and I turned the television off. For once it wasn't a foreigner pretending to be American asking me if I wanted to refinance my home. It was Maddox Jolie asking for my help with his new tattoo kit! how could I refuse?